<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d35178454\x26blogName\x3dTheta+Prime\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLUE\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://thetaprime.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://thetaprime.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d-1838591666017567965', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

Monologue

I walked away from her with more hate than I could handle, but it was all at myself. I just watched my life fall apart within minutes, constantly a voice in the back of my head telling me to shutup. It told me to hold her, and I wanted to, but you can't just forget what's important. "You need to have respect for yourself", I thought, "You can't let yourself be walked over and used". There are times in life you need to stand up for yourself, for what you want. But how can I have what I'm throwing away. Is respect more important than what's in my heart? I talk like I know what I'm doing, and I try to put up a good fight, I create the illusion that I'm a man, but I'm not really. I have no idea who I am anymore, but it's not that I've lost myself, it's that I used to think I knew myself. That walk home was the coldest I've ever had to endure, I questioned whether walking was worth it. All I wanted to do was lay in the snow and let time spin past until I had a reason to get up. There is nothing left, I have no where to go now, no one who cares about me. You were the first and last person that cared, or seemed to care. I don't what to do now, I'm hurt, in more pain than I can comprehend. But, why isn't she? I'm afraid and have no one to go to. I just know I can't let this be the end, I can't take it now, let alone when I see her. I don't want to lose you now, I still need you.

You can leave your response or bookmark this post to del.icio.us by using the links below.
Comment | Bookmark | Go to end